mmmmm,,,,, red suede shoes. I bought these shoes 2 years ago and have worn them once! I find I can't wear them while I'm so over weight,,, so these are one of my "targets",,,, to be able to get them on and walk for a bit and they feel comfy. lol.

Well so far this week it's been good, since getting back on track on Saturday I've had good days, made good choices food wise and done a bit more exercise,,, not that I ever enjoy exercise, I hate it and always will but I now know it's a necessary evil,,,,very evil if you ask me !! So I'm hoping for at least 1lb loss tmoro at WI,,,,, fingers x'd

Nothing else much happening at the moment, I'm still waiting for a job,,, I've applied for everything possible over the past few weeks. All of the jobs have long end dates for the applications tho, so from actually applying to hearing about interviews can sometimes be as long as 6 weeks !! it's so frustrating. I get annoyed to when I hear people moaning about work,,,,DO THEY NOT REALISE HOW LUCKY THEY ARE ??? ggggrrrrrrrrrrr

Christchurch Priory,,,, nice isn't it.

Well after having 2 rotten days,,, I got back on track yesterday and have been very good so am back to feeling positive about my weight loss. I have to admit that I am quite surprised,,, pleasantly so,,, at how easy weight watchers has been over the past 6 weeks. Normally I would be ok for 2 or 3 weeks and then lose the plot totally and give up,,,, vowing never to do any other diet plan !! Then a few months later would be trying some other quick fix,,,, failing spectacularly again,,,,, putting more weight on and then deciding to try something else,,, and so it would go.

I have avoided weight watchers for years basically because of my 1st experience way way back in 1972,,,,,, now I think I should have given it a go before now,, but hey at least I have started doing it now and am very happy with what I'm achieving. The best bit is that no foods are banned as long as you point everything you can have anything. Brill.

O,,,,,,M,,,,,G,,,,,,, I can't believe it, Michael Jackson has died !! He was a brilliant, talented artist and the music world will be the poorer for his loss

I had a pretty good day yesterday, food wise, even though I had a rotten day in other ways. I'm pleased that I didn't turn to food, which is my normal response to stress or anger. I must be "learning",,,,,lol,,,, I'm just wondering how long it takes to actually "get into the habit" of doing weight watchers,,,you know,,,how long before it becomes natural to eat properly ? I'm into my 6th week now and it's still all a bit of a minefield for me. I have to check in the book quite a lot as I'm not sure of the points of some foods,,,,, the ones I eat often though I do know,,, so I guess that's a good sign???

I'm still waiting to hear about jobs, I've applied for a few that the end date is today so IF I'm gonna hear it won't be till next week,,,so YET another week of fingers x'd !! The agency rang me on Wednesday to say they'd put me forward for a part time temp job to start on Monday, but as yet I haven't heard anymore so I'm guessing I haven't got that either. I don't care what anyone says,,,AGE is definately a huge barrier to getting work ! everyone always says "oh they can't discriminate on age",,,,, B******S,,,,, they CAN and they DO,,,, I always have really good interviews,,,, but don't get the job,,,,then receive great feedback,,,, so if I'm doing so great, why am I not getting the job ? Answer: someone younger gets it. Anyway,, off my soap box now and going to do some housework. Byeeee

Foxy in the garden !!



Well, today is not a good day,,,, I feel really bad about not pointing yesterday,,,, I didn't enjoy the food I ate anyway and felt sluggish and bloated and just horrible !! I really won't do that again. It's so true what they say at weight watchers "fail to plan, plan to fail" ,,,, and I did.



Anyway I've drawn a line underneath it and have started again this morning, completely on track, had porridge for brekky and jacket spud with cottage cheese for lunch so feel happy with that.

Well what can I say,,,, it's a few hours since I did the first part of this blog,,,since then things have taken a turn for the worse and how I haven't turned to food I don't know,,, !! Went to pick Andy up from work and got to the car only to find a bloody parking ticket on it,,,long story,,,but suffice to say it has upset me immensely,,, basically there is a 30 minute limit for parking but as we live here we don't have anywhere else to park,,,,, the council just say go in one of the side roads,,,but the nearest one is a five minute walk away and there are enough spaces for about 5 cars !!! Useless. I'm going now.

Just a quick report tonight.

I'm absolutely shattered,,,, Andy and I have spent the day in Swanage, the weather was gorgeous and we walked a lot so I just want to chill.

BUT,,,,I had to report that I had my weigh in today,,,I have lost a further 1.5 lbs,,,, so that's a total of 8 lbs in 5 weeks,,,, I'm very happy with that and more importantly I got my 1st SILVER 7 and am made up,,,,, great achievement for me,,, only 6 lbs to go till my 1st stone !! Yippeee

Well,,, I haven't had a good start to the day. Firstly I had to go and have a fasting blood test done so I was very hungry,,,,, had blood taken ok and got home. Had some porridge for brekky coz it always fills me up nicely,,,, then I put my lappy on and got this email from a guy who bought my old mobile phone off me about 2 weeks ago,,,,saying that it was working ok but now it isnt, it keeps going off by itself and he cant get it back on,,, then it's ok and then it goes off again and he wants to return it to me and have his money back !! I'm not happy about that coz if it was ok and now it isn't surely that isn't my problem,,,? but I don't want him to contact ebay and complain coz I've got 100% feedback,,,, bummer,,,don't know what to do so will have to have a think.

Soooooooo,,,,all this b4 lunch time !! hope it doesn't knock me off course coz I've been doing really well this week and It's weigh in tmoro so don't wanna blow it,,,I'm pretty sure I've lost at least 1.5 lbs this week.

I did my Rosemary Conley exercise dvd this morning,,, so I'm keeping up with the bits of exercise to try and maximise my weight loss,,,, (still hate it),,,lol,,, hopefully when I next report it'll be to say YIPPEE,,,,got my silver 7 !! lol

Oh how I wish I was there again now,,, Egypt,,,,lovely

Well I've just had a really nice lunch,,,pitta bread with low fat houmus, wafer thin ham, loads of salad followed by a pear. I've had a good few days and feel very posisitve about my weigh in on Wednesday.

I received The Biggest Loser workout DVD this morning. Well what can I say ? It's very energetic and looks really hard work but it also looks really good,,,,lol,,,what I do like is the fact that the BL contestants are the ones doing the workouts with Richard (phew!!) and Angie and it's not a class of people who exercise regularly together and never get any steps wrong,,,it's funny in places watching them get things wrong or,, like Katey,, hardly MOVE !!! lol,,, it does look really good tho so I'll give it a go, I'll probably need an oxygen tent half way through but hey it's exercise.

On a different note,,,I'm off to trim the front garden hedge now.

LOL,,,,, just luvit !!

Well I've had a really good day today,,, I've kept within my points and have made filling choices with my food so am feeling very smug ! I've just made a delicious chicken balti from my weight watchers recipe book and it was really good,,,I was surprised coz a lot of the recipes are a bit incipid :-( ,,,,,, to say the least,,,,, and I am nicely satisfied now.

I also did my exercise dvd this afternoon so that's good too. I can't wait till my new workout dvd arrives,,,I've ordered "THE BIGGEST LOSER" workout dvd and it shoul be here on Monday. Good value too off Amazon £10.98, instead of almost £18,,,,I just hope it's hard work and that you don't need loads of equipment coz I don't have anything ! lol

I had a nice long phone conversation with one of my good friends who I haven't seen or spoken to for quite a few months, so that has also helped to brighten my day. All in all I'm a very happy bunny today !! lets hope this mood continues.

I was 3 stones lighter in this photo than I am now and I can't believe I let myself go so much !! trouble was it kinda crept up on me over a few years and so I didn't really notice it.

This time it's not going to happen,,,,once I have lost the weight I'm going to be more consious of what I'm doing.

I didn't have a very good weight loss last night,,,,only half a lb,,,,I really wanted 1 lb so that I'd get my silver 7 award from class,,,but I will do it next week and a bit more. I went for a power walk this afternoon which doesn't seem very exciting (it wasn't lol) but an achievement for me as I hate exercise but more than that I don't like being outside doing it,,,, I imagine everyone going past me in cars thinking "god look at that big fat lump,,,she should go home",,, I'd much rather go to the gym and run on the treadmill,,,,but at the moment I can't afford to so the great outdoors it is for me then !! lol I know it'll all be worth it when I've lost all my excess weight and flab but it's all soooo far away,,,,a long journey, and I never did travel well.

I thought I'd stick this picture on,,,taken on holiday in Egypt about 4 years ago, I think. Andy and I were on a trip to a secluded island where we all did some snorkelling. I'm not sure I actually liked it,,, it was lovely to see all the fish and so close too,,,but I don't like the snorkel noises coz as you are under the water everything sounds amplified and my breathing was getting louder and louder and in the end I had to get out of the water !! However the day was very nice and relaxing.

Back to the present. I've had my weigh in tonight and wasn't very happy, I only lost half lb. I was hoping to get 1 lb this week coz that would have meant I'd lost half a stone, and that's a bit of a goal,,,,but never mind I'll do it at next weeks weigh in, just got to be really aware of my points and try harder!

Just thought I'd put this one on,,,fathers day coming up and all,,,I was about 12 in this photo with my dad. Sadly he passed away in March so this will be the 1st year without him. I wish I was that slim now!

I've not been having such a good week this week,,, I keep thinking I have been sticking to my "points" each day but some days have gone over and then tried to claw them back the next day without much success,,,and as far as exercise is concerned,,,forget it, I seem to have lost the will to do anything. I reckon it's because I'm still worrying about work. I want to join my local gym but without the money it's not possible. The sooner a job turns up the better. Well have not had a good week so am not going to carry on bleating,,,,so,,,bye for now.

Well,,,,what can I say ? Picture taken at about the exact time I decided that enough was enough and I HAVE to lose weight. I look a right mess and felt horrible, it's moments like these that I remember, I can count on one hand the times I've looked at a photo of me and actually didn't cringe inside. I hate photo's.

I've had a really good week so far with my eating plan, I've made sure I planned my meals and have prepared well in advance,,,,I'm not very good at being organised so for me this in itself is an achievement. I've pretty much had all my points for each day and have drunk 2 litres of water,,,,not great for your sleeping patterns,,,up at least 3 times at night running to the bathroom for a pee, but hey it's all weight coming off so I shouldn't really complain. I'm filling up on zero point foods and have made some really tasty zero point soups too,,,,so all in all I'm feeling very positive and quite happy about my future weight loss.

Well I did the exercise dvd,,,,I actually did a longer session than I normally do so that's gotta be good.

This photo was taken when I was about 12, with my cousin Chris, so I haven't always been huge. I'm not sure when the "real" weight started to pile on but I can't ever really remember being anything other than fat, isn't that weird coz quite obviously from this photo,,,I wasn't always fat. I think the problems start as soon as you begin to diet, certainly in my case they did. I was 10 stones and decided I needed to diet, what was that all about ? I've only ever been 10 stones once in my life since then and that was after I'd done the Lighterlife programme.
With each "diet" I did I gained more weight as soon as I stopped,,,lesson to be learnt there. Either don't start a diet or don't stop one lol.

I am thinking positively about the weight watchers plan that I'm doing now though, it seems far more user friendly and because it doesn't ban any foods you don't feel deprived of anything, as long as you plan your meals and allow for treats it's quite easy, not like dieting at all,,,in fact I hate that word, "diet" it sends you into "eating frenzy" mode as soon as you say it ! I'm not on a diet,,,, I'm following the weight watchers plan, that sounds so much better lol. This time I am going to get to goal and stay there.

This is the most recent photo I have,,,it was xmas 2008 with my boys, Rob on my right, Paul on my left. As you can see there is a huge difference between me in that photo and the one taken in 2002 ! This photo made me "wake up" and decide to do something, but until now I wasn't in the right frame of mind to act on my decision.

I had my 2nd weigh in and had gained half a lb, I wasn't really surprised as I had found the plan difficult to stick to in my 2nd week coz Andy was off work on his hol and we had a few days out and I hadn't stuck to the plan properly,,,I failed to plan (as they say) and the scales showed the results of this failure. But I wasn't going to lose heart and give up (something I do all the time) I am determined that this time I am going to continue with what I've started and actually achieve something ! I'm so fed up of being a loser.

I really ought to do some exercise too,,,but at the moment I can't get motivated,,,I think if I had a job it'd be better coz all I'm concentrating on right now is job hunting, I can't really think of much else,,,,,spose I could dust off my Rosemary Conley/Coleen Nolan DVD and give that a go a couple of times a week ? In fact, I'm gonna do it NOW,,,,,,,I'm off,,,,,,see you later guys xx

This photo was taken in August 2002 not long after losing just over 3 stones on the Lighterlife programme. I felt great and didn't look too bad either. Sadly, since then the weight has crept back on and I've tried different things over the years,,,the usual quick fixes,,,pills and potions and daft things that cost a lot but didn't do much !! I decided 4 weeks ago that enough was enough,,,,I'd hit 14 stones !!! my heaviest ever and I've had enough. I feel old, fat, frumpy, lethargic, depressed and very unsexy. Soooooooo,,,,,I decided to give weight watchers another go. I checked it out on the internet first and reading about it realised that actually it had changed a huge amount since 1972, when you had to eat liver twice a week and fish 5 times a week etc, etc, etc,,,, all of which was a nightmare coz at 15 I wasn't really into liver !! eeeeuuuukkkk
I bought a monthly pass,,,that way I knew I had to attend the group at least 4 times coz I'd already paid plus there was no registration fee. So off I went, nervously, to my first meeting. It was ok, I got a nice little bag with some books and leaflets and guidance on what to do. My leader set me a 5% goal and I am working towards it now. I went home, sat down and planned my meals for the coming week. I had to use 18 points so that sounded ok, not too daunting I guess. Anyway I got on with the task in hand, watching carefully that I didn't go over my points, checking the correct weights and measures. Don't get me wrong I didn't spend all week weighing and measuring food, it isn't that strict and no food is banned which is great coz you can have your little choccy fixes and crisps etc as long as you point them,,,most foods are listed in the little book you get so I couldn't go wrong. After the first week I went to weigh in and had lost 4 lbs !!! I was made up and spurred on to continue.